ARR 1988 - Flipbook - Page 39
"This is one of the worst days I can remember," rants the father. That
wasn't quite what was written in the script, but the audience will get the
point.
My part as Freddy, the bench warmer is quite simple. A moderate
number oflines and standard blocking. All I have to do is act kind-hearted
and save the day. I have a lot in common with my character. We're both
college freshmen, and we both couldn't catch a football if it were handed to
us. We're both scared to death of anyone half an inch taller than us, and
neither one of us has the courage to say anything meaningful to women. You
know you're in bad shape when you find yourself in a melodrama script.
"There you are, my dear," Bart says as he enters the stage. The
audience boos; at least they know their part. Bart is played by David
Landberg.
He looks like a quarterback. He's big, short haired and has no neck.
David knows how to do melodrama-total ham, you can tell he's having fun,
too.
"This is it," Bart snivels, "Time to make a choice. Will your daughter
marry me, or will you spend the rest ofyour lives on the street?" The audience
hates him.
rm ready, I think to myself. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I am
ready!
Am I ready? Well, let's see: I know my lines, my shoes are on the
correct feet, my fly is zipped, and I'm standing at the correct entrance.
So what's the problem?
Props! Do I have my prop? My left hand descends from its position
behind my head and proceeds to my left pocket to examine its contents. It
locates breath spray and a soft plastic comb. My hand escorts the comb out
of the pocket in order to allow my eyes to confirm the discovery. I have my
prop.
But I shouldn't have all that other stuff in there. The last thing I want
to do while on stage is reach for the comb and pull out a handful of junk. So
I take out the breath spray, pen, and money and stash them next to a box of
props.
"You get out of our house this instant," the mother insists. Now
Stephanie can act. This melodrama drivel is below her. I really don't know
why she wastes her time with it. She's underplaying now so as not to make
everyone else look bad, but once in a while her true acting ability shines
through.
"You have no choice, Mrs. Peterson." Bart searches for his next line.
"Your daughter will marry me. And you're all invited to the wedding!"
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