CCChat-Magazine 29 2 - Flipbook - Page 14
You can survive suicidal feelings if you do
either of two things:
(1) find a way to reduce your pain, or
(2) find a way to increase your coping
resources.
Both are possible. Now I want to tell you five
things to think about.
1 You need to hear that people do get through
this -- even people who feel as badly as you
are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very
good chance that you are going to live. I hope
that this information gives you some sense of
hope.
If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you
will eventually collapse if I add enough
weights... no matter how much you want to
remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do
with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up,
if you could. scale showing pain is greater
weight Don't accept it if someone tells you,
"That's not enough to be suicidal about."
There are many kinds of pain that may lead to
suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable
may differ from person to person. What might
be bearable to someone else, may not be
bearable to you. The point at which the pain
becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of
coping resources you have. Individuals vary
greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.
When pain exceeds pain-coping resources,
suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is
neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of
character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an
imbalance of pain versus coping resources.
2 Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself,
"I will wait 24 hours before I do anything." Or a
week. Remember that feelings and actions are
two different things - just because you feel like
killing yourself, doesn't mean that you have to
actually do it right this minute. Put some
distance between your suicidal feelings and
suicidal action. Even if it's just 24 hours. You
have already done it for 5 minutes, just by
reading this page. You can do it for another 5
minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep
going, and realize that while you still feel
suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on
it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it
is to you.
3 People often turn to suicide because they are
seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief
is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it.
You will not feel the relief you so desperately
seek, if you are dead.
4 Some people will react badly to your suicidal
feelings, either because they are frightened, or
angry; they may
Making The Invisible Visible