GMF Brochure 2021 - Flipbook - Page 17
What a strange year and a half it’s been. But what a productive year and a half it’s been.
I have the strange affinity that so many of us unfortunate souls suffer from of wanting to
work all the time. It’s both a blessing and a curse. Since I graduated in 2019 it has been one
non-stop roller coaster of multiple projects followed by multiple projects. Don't get me
wrong, they aren't by any means all paid work; as lucky as I have been in that regard too.
I apply for absolutely everything and about 5% of the time I get lucky. When you're applying
for 500 things that’s still 25 projects you manage to secure.
It’s massively debilitating to my mental health on the other hand, I'm the very definition
of a stress head and I remember making myself very poorly with my food tech gcse short c
ourse that I then thought was the most important thing in the world. It goes without saying
that my coursework was used for years after as a prime example of goof work. This is not
me boasting by the way, It is me in utter disbelief at what an idiot I was. I thought this level
of care for every little thing I did was normal. It was only later in life that I was diagnosed
with anxiety and depression and it gave a sort of meaning to my endless wittering.
I have not let this relationship with my work life balance go despite my knowledge of how
unhealthy it is and the same knowledge from every single person that has to also put up
with it ie my parents. It gets in the way of my most important relationships. If anything
was to ever split me and my boyfriend up you can bet it would be my relationship with my
career. However, the last year a strange thing happened. Everything slowed down. I lost a job,
I got furlough from another one, I had time. You probably think this is heading in the
direction of 'i didn't have any projects to do so I enjoyed life' and you would be wrong.
I always seem to find a project even when they’re in scarce quantity. I did numerous
rehearsed readings, scratch nights, short films (in the small periods we were allowed to film),
joined Sheffield theatres young company towards the end, applied for funding from ACE
(which I got), read hundreds of scripts but most importantly; I started to write.
I discovered a great passion for spoken word that was always there really, I just hadn't had
time to put it into practise. I wrote every day. Short plays, articles, radio plays, spoken
words and hundreds of poems. I found i could take out all my sadness and anger and love
and confusion and hate and passion out on the page and it would listen; intently.
The pandemic gave me time to discover other creative outlets other than writing and
allowed me the space I needed to put pen to paper. It is possible that I would never have
uncovered this wonderful escape if it wasn't for this period. Or perhaps I would have, but
much later. Or perhaps I would have discovered it anyway. Still, I remain grateful for the
length of time that I was given and able to slow down in and listen. I have since been on
BBC radio Sheffield upload 4 times, been published by 5 literary magazines, in 1 anthology
and I am soon to have my very own chapbook released. Food tech paranoid Ellie would
be pleased but really that's not what I’m trying to say.
We all deserve the space to slow
down, even if its only a little, and find joy in something we create
think this is the good that’s come out of this otherwise utterly
period of time.
year that I
Things have certainly ramped up now and I am busier than ever,
astronomy GCSE taking Ellie, but I will forever appreciate the
allowed myself to do something that was truly good for my soul
times I spent laughing with family while playing the weekly pub
binging normal people with my mum or the lovely strolls to the
park- not in a particular rush to get back to anything for once.
covid, at least you were good for something.
Salford Arts Theatre
Friday 3rd September 2021