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How and When to Tell Your Kids about Sex
decision parents must face based on their individual children, considering
that first messages are always the most powerful messages. If, as a Christian
parent, you want to begin to shape a godly attitude in your child about sex,
why would you wait until they first soak in the misperceptions of the world?
Why not build godly attitudes and views from the foundation up?
If you’re reading this with an adopted child, use this opportunity to
explain that not every couple will have biological children. If a baby doesn’t
grow in the wife’s womb, the couple might look for a baby to adopt. And
some women are not able to take care of a baby, so another family might
adopt the baby and make it part of their family forever. Even though the
baby grew inside a different mother, the husband and wife love this baby
very much. Adoption is another way that God makes families.
AGES EIGHT TO TWELVE
What’s the Big Deal?: Why God Cares about Sex
This book reinforces the messages of our first two children’s books, covering
the basics of sexual intercourse and the fundamental creational goodness of
our sexuality. It continues the task of deliberately building children’s understanding of why God intends sexual intercourse to be reserved for marriage.
But this book goes further than the earlier books, adding more of the facts
your child will need to know as they approach puberty. Further, it will help
you begin the process of inoculating your child against the negative moral
messages of the world. In How and When to Tell Your Kids about Sex, we argue
that Christian parents should not try to completely shelter their children from
the destructive moral messages of the world. If they mature in environments
where they are not exposed to germs, children grow up with depleted immune
systems that are ineffectual for resisting disease. When parents shelter their
children too much, children are left naive and vulnerable; parents risk communicating that the negative messages of the world are so powerful that Christians
cannot even talk about them.
But neither should you let your child be inundated with society’s
destructive messages. The principle of inoculation suggests that you should
deliberately expose your child to the contrary moral messages they will hear
from the world. It should be in your home that your child first learns that
many people in our world do not believe in reserving sex for marriage, and
it should be in your home that your child first understands such problems
xviii

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